Courtesy of Seksualiti Merdeka….

STATEMENT FROM SEKSUALITI MERDEKA

(Versi Bahasa Melayu di bawah kenyataan Bahasa Inggeris)

RECEIVING DEATH THREATS FOR GIVING HOPE

Wed 22 Dec, 2010

What Is “It Gets Better In Malaysia”?

It Gets Better in Malaysia is a video project about giving hope to young LGBT Malaysians: even though things can be rough during the teenage years, it can get better. This message is targeted at the minority of young Malaysians who are growing up as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (LGBT).

This project is in response to accounts of suicides and attempted suicides by LGBT teenagers and adults. Statistics of such suicides are anywhere between three to six times higher than by heterosexuals. This is due to the overwhelming feelings of loneliness, fear or hopelessness that result from the stigma and discrimination against them. Most people have their families to turn to. For LGBT youths, even their own families can be a source of rejection. They have no one to turn to. We decided it is up to us who have survived similar situations to reach out to young LGBTs. This is why the project was born. It’s not about making coming out videos. It is about giving hope to youths at risk.

Seksualiti Merdeka, the organiser of an annual human rights festival on sexuality, especially the human rights of LGBT, took on this empowering project in belief of the message’s importance and relevance to Malaysia. The festival is organised by a coalition of groups and inviduals including the Bar Council Malaysia, SUARAM, Empower, PT Foundation, United Nations, Amnesty International, KRYSS, Purple Lab, Matahari Books, among others.

To date, our video project has seen 15 contributions, four of which are online. The first is by singer Peter Ong on 9 Dec 2010, followed by engineer-writer Azwan Ismail on 15 Dec, university student Kavidha on 17 Dec, and Pastor Joe Pang on 20 Dec.

Within five days, Azwan Ismail’s video – It Gets Better in Malaysia: Azwan Ismail “Saya gay, saya okay” – reached over 150,000 views and 3,400 comments, many of which are against him: commentators have urged him to repent and return to the right path (heterosexuality). However, most of these comments are vicious, rude and uncalled for, and some have even threatened violence and murder towards Azwan and Seksualiti Merdeka members.

We find it irresponsible of the Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Datuk Seri Jamil Khir Baharom to ask JAKIM to monitor the activities of gay groups, while failing to ask JAKIM to criminalise those who post abusive and vulgar comments which threaten Malaysian citizens with violence and death.

The honorable minister’s primary concern is the image of Islam being tarnished. However, we feel that Islam’s image can also be tarnished by those who speak with hate and intolerance, completely without a trace of humanity.

We never intended to tarnish the image of Islam. We simply wanted to give hope.

We hope our leaders will not ignore threats of physical violence. Besides preventing meaningful discourse and debate, these threats also further intimidate fellow Malaysians who are already fearful for their well-being.

AVENUES TO EXPRESS OURSELVES

We believe in respectful exchange of perspectives in Malaysia if we are truly a nation that celebrates diversity, dynamism, and creativity. If LGBT Malaysians are given avenues to express ourselves, we are certain the public will be more understanding and realise we are not a threat to society.

We advocate the importance of self-awareness and self-acceptance for our emotional, psychological, and spiritual well-being. This promotes awareness and acceptance of others, and responsibility to ourselves and to others.

Sexual orientation and gender identity are identity issues. LGBTs do seek and fall in love just as heterosexuals do. There are already so many gay Malaysians working in all sectors of society from engineers to lawyers to CEOs.

Homosexuality is not a foreign concept, writer Amir Muhammad says in support of Azwan’s video. “Some people,” he explains, “aren’t appalled by the fact of Azwan Ismail’s sexuality. What they are affronted by is that he’s a person who’s giving his own name, and being completely honest about what he wants to say.”

The intolerant and vicious comments prove that Malaysia is a hostile environment preventing any LGBTs from leading honest, open and meaningful lives. This vicious cycle of shame and intimidation needs to be broken once and for all. The pressure in having to pretend to be something we are not and the loneliness and fear that comes with it often results in a misery that may push some to the verge of suicide.

And that is why, more than ever, we need messages of hope such as that by Azwan Ismail:

“I am confident that things will be better. We have to gather our strengths from around us because there people who can help us and give us the confidence to be ourselves, to face our future…”

We need each other – not just other LGBTs, but all Malaysians. Please stop targeting and marginalising LGBT Malaysians. Give us a chance to tell our stories of hope.

RECOMMENDATIONS
We believe Malaysian leaders, the media and the public should:

1. Ensure the non-discrimination of all Malaysians based on sexual orientation and gender identity.

2. Condemn threats of violence and murder in the name of any religion

3. Establish non-judgemental, constructive and positive spaces and enable opportunities for LGBTs in Malaysia to express themselves and to promote better understanding on issues based on sexual orientation and gender identity.

4. Assure protection to participants of the “It Gets Better in Malaysia” project for helping to spread hope to our LGBT youths

Seksualiti Merdeka

www.seksualitimerdeka.org

seksualitimerdeka@gmail.com

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KENYATAAN DARI SEKSUALITI MERDEKA

MENERIMA UGUTAN BUNUH BILA MEMBERI HARAPAN

Rabu 22hb Dec, 2010

APAKAH “IT GETS BETTER IN MALAYSIA?”

It Gets Better in Malaysia adalah projek video yang merakamkan mesej harapan untuk golongan muda LGBT Malaysia: walaupun situasi mungkin amat sukar di zaman remaja, namun keadaan akan menjadi lebih baik — ‘It gets better’. Mesej-mesej ini adalah untuk sebahagian kecil remaja Malaysia yang lesbian, gay, biseksual, transeksual (LGBT).

Projek ini adalah tindak balas kepada kisah-kisah benar mengenai remaja dan dewasa LGBT yang bunuh diri atau cuba bunuh diri. Statistik menunjukkan bahawa frekuensi dan kemungkinan berlakunya kes bunuh diri remaja LGBT adalah antara tiga hingga enam kali lebih tinggi berbanding golongan heteroseksual. Ini adalah akibat perasaan kesepian, ketakutan, atau putus asa yang disebab oleh stigma dan diskriminasi terhadap mereka. Kebanyakan orang boleh mengadu kepada keluarga, tapi ramai remaja LGBT dipulau oleh keluarga mereka sendiri. Mereka tidak boleh mengadu kepada sesiapa. Kami memutuskan untuk memberi semangat kepada mereka kerana kami dapat mendalami perasaan yang sama. Inilah sebabnya projek ini dimulakan. Ia bukan projek membuat video ‘pengakuan gay’. Sebaliknya ia untuk memberi harapan kepada orang muda yang mungkin tiada harapan untuk hidup.

Seksualiti Merdeka, penganjur acara tahunan hak asasi manusia mengenai seksualiti, terutamanya hak asasi golongan LGBT, memperjuangkan projek ini berlandaskan kepentingannya untuk Malaysia. Penganjur pesta ini terdiri daripada gabungan beberapa kumpulan-kumpulan dan individu-individu, termasuk Bar Council Malaysia, SUARAM, Empower, PT Foundation, United Nations, Amnesty International, KRYSS, Purple Lab, Matahari Books, dan lain-lain.

UGUTAN MEMBUNUH PEMBERI HARAPAN

Setakat ini, projek video ini telah menerima 15 sumbangan, empat diantaranya yang telah disiarkan di Internet. Video pertama adalah dari penanyi Peter Ong pada 9 Disember 2010, diikuti oleh jurutera-penulis Azwan Ismail pada 15 Disember, seorang mahasiswi Kavidha pada 17 Disember, dan seorang paderi Joe Pang pada 20 Disember.

Dalam tempoh 5 hari, video Azwan Ismail yang bertajuk – It Gets Better in Malaysia: Azwan Ismail “Saya gay, saya okay” – mendapat lebih daripada 150,000 hits dan 3,400 komen, kebanyakan yang menentang beliau. Ramai komentator menggesanya untuk bertaubat dan kembali ke pangkal jalan (heteroseksual). Namun begitu, kebanyakan komen bersifat kejam, kasar, dan biadab, termasuklah ancaman keselamatan beliau serta ugutan bunuh.

Menteri di Jabatan Perdana Menteri Datuk Seri Jamil Khir Baharom bertindak secara tidak bertanggungjawab sebab beliau meminta JAKIM untuk memantau kegiatan kumpulan homoseksual tanpa meminta JAKIM untuk memantau mereka yang memberi komen yang kasar dan kesat, serta mengancam keselamatan dan nyawa rakyat negara Malaysia.

Tampaknya bahawa prioriti menteri terhormat adalah risiko menjejaskan imej agama Islam. Tetapi pada pandangan kami, imej Islam juga boleh dircalar oleh penganut-penganut yang bersuara tanpa toleransi dan penuh kebencian, serta langsung tiada sifat perikemanusiaan.

Kami tidak berniat untuk menjejaskan imej Islam. Kami hanya ingin memberi harapan.

Kami berharap para pemimpin kita tidak akan mengabaikan ancaman keganasan fizikal. Perlakuan sedemikian tidak bermanfaat kepada sesiapa dan menghalang diskusi yang bermakna sambil mengugut golongan rakyat Malaysia yang sudahpun tersisih dan hidup dalam ketakutan.

RUANG UNTUK BERSUARA

Kami percaya yang rakyat Malaysia mampu meraikan kepelbagaian, dinamisme dan kreativiti dan juga saling bertukar pelbagai perspektif dengan hormat. Jika golongan LGBT di Malaysia diberi ruang untuk bersuara, kami yakin orang ramai saling memahami dan sedar kami bukan ancaman kepada masyarakat.

Kami ingin mengutarakan pentingnya kesejahteraan emosi, psikologi dan kerohanian diri dengan menekan aspek kesedaran diri dan penerimaan diri sendiri bagi setiap insan. Sifat ini memupuk kesedaran dan penerimaan akan orang lain, serta memupuk sifat bertanggungjawab diri sendiri setiap insan kepada diri sendiri dan juga orang lain.

Orientasi seksual dan jatidiri gender adalah isu identiti. Golongan LGBT mencari dan jatuh cinta seperti golongan heteroseksual. Adalah kenyataan yang ramai rakyat Malaysia homoseksual yang berada di khalayak ramai dalam semua lapisan masyarakat, dari jurutera ke peguam ke CEOs.

Homoseksualiti bukan suatu konsep asing, kata penulis Amir Muhammad yang memberi sokongan kepada video Azwan dalam blognya. “Beberapa orang,” dia menjelaskan, “tidak terkejut oleh kenyataan seksualiti Azwan Ismail. Apa yang buat mereka rasa terhina adalah bahawa dia memberi namanya yang sebenar, dan benar-benar jujur tentang apa yang ingin dikatakannya. “

Komen-komen yang kejam dan tidak berperikemanusiaan membuktikan bahawa Malaysia adalah tempat yang amat menekan bagi golongan LGBT yang ingin hidup secara jujur, terbuka dan bermakna. Lingkaran rasa malu dan ugutan ini harus dihentikan. Paksaan untuk berpura-pura sebagai heteroseksual akan mengakibatkan tekanan yang bertambah dengan kesepian dan ketakutan. Kesengsaraan ini boleh mendorong sesiapa sahaja untuk mengakhirkan nyawa sendiri.

Sebab itu, mesej yang memberi harapan seperti yang dilafazkan Azwan Ismail diperlukan lebih-lebih lagi: “Saya yakin keadaan akan menjadi lebih baik. Kita cuma perlu mencari sumber-sumber kekuatan di sekeliling kita kerana terdapat mereka yang dapat membantu kita dan akhirnya dapat memberikan keyakinan kepada diri kita untuk menempuhi hari-hari yang akan datang…”

Kami saling memerlukan di antara satu sama lain – bukan hanya LGBT, tetapi semua rakyat Malaysia. Tolong hentikan menyisihan dan pengniayaan rakyat LGBT Malaysia. Berilah kami peluang untuk berkongsi harapan.

KAMI MENGESYORKAN

Kami mengesyorkan para pemimpin, media dan masyarakat Malaysia supaya:

1. Menjamin semua rakyat Malaysia tidak menghadapi diskriminasi atas dasar identiti jantina dan orientasi seksual

2. Menolak sekeras-kerasnya ancaman keganasan dan ugutan nyawa atas nama agama

3. Mengadakan ruang-ruang yang tidak menghakimi, yang membina dan positif, dan memberi peluang untuk golongan LGBT di Malaysia untuk mengekspresikan diri mereka dan untuk mempromosikan pemahaman yang lebih baik tentang isu-isu berdasarkan orientasi seksual dan jatidiri gender.

4. Menjamin keselamatan peserta “It Gets Better in Malaysia” supaya mesej harapan kepada remaja dapat disebarkan kepada mereka yang putus asa

Seksualiti Merdeka

www.seksualitimerdeka.org

seksualitimerdeka@gmail.com 

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Coverage in the news:

Berita Harian: JAKIM Pantau Seks Songsang

Harian Metro: Berani Mengaku Gay

New Straits Time: Being Gay Is Against Islam

The Star: Authorities Unhappy With Gay Confession

Associated Press: AP Interview: Malaysia gay man gets threats

Fridae: It Gets Better in Malaysia project calls for greater understanding of LGBT issues after death threats

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Press Statement by the Mak Nyah Community of Malaysia

30 November 2010

We are the Mak Nyah community and we are being persecuted by Section 66 on “Lelaki berlagak seperti perempuan” of the Syariah Criminal Enactment (Negeri Sembilan) 1992 (please refer to this section and similar sections in other states in Malaysia in Appendix 1). We have suffered mental distress, physical violence and even sexual molestation at the hands of the religious officers who enforce these laws. We are stripped of a life of dignity and deprived of our personal liberty, and we fear for our lives. We are unable to step out of our homes without the fear of getting harassed, abused or arrested. We are no longer able to go out or to eat and drink in public without the fear of harassment and abuse from the religious officers who enforce these laws. We demand that the religious authorities of the State of Negeri Sembilan and all its officers stop harassing, victimising and persecuting us for who we are.

In Negeri Sembilan where we live, we are forced to walk around without our brassieres as it is used as evidence against us upon arrest. We are “advised” by the religious officers to just wear t-shirts, track bottoms or men’s shorts. Despite following these instructions, we are still arrested on the basis that we physically look like women. We are sexually molested or our breasts are groped when the religious officers who enforce these laws insist on checking if we are wearing brassieres. We are sometimes made to change our clothes in full view of the religious officers.

We are instructed to plead “Guilty” by the religious officers and even by the state’s Legal Aid Bureau. Without proper legal advice, we plead “guilty” and as a result we are sentenced with heavy fines and sometimes we even face imprisonment. Under such laws, it is impossible for us to live and earn a living. Sometimes, we are also compelled to attend mandatory religious counseling sessions. We are Mak Nyahs. No amount of “counseling” or coercion can ever change that. All we ask is to be left alone and for respect of our personal and private lives. Such mandatory counseling we consider to be an infringement of our personal liberty.

We also suffer hardships in obtaining employment as we are discriminated against by employers on the basis of who we are. We suffer rejection in schools and in some institutions of higher learning. At the latter, we are sometimes required to attend boot camps in order to make us more “manly”.

As Mak Nyahs, we have the right to live with dignity like all citizens in Malaysia. We have the right to our identity, the right to self-expression in our dress and mannerisms, the right to respect for our personal and private life and the right to livelihood as other citizens in Malaysia. These are our fundamental liberties as enshrined in Articles 5, 8 and 10 of the Federal Constitution, the supreme law of the land. Any law that violates our rights arbitrarily is no longer good law.

These are also violations of our human rights under the Universal Declaration of Human Rights and the Jogjakarta Principles on human rights relating to sexual orientation and gender identity.

We ask the Legislative assemblymen of Negeri Sembilan, the Negeri Sembilan Religious Department Directors and all other Malaysian elected representatives and leaders to stop the violence and persecution that has been targeted against our Mak Nyah community.

We appeal to all who believe in freedom under the Federal Constitution, human rights, non-discrimination and equality, to stand with us and join us in our call for the stop the targeted persecution and violence towards our Mak Nyah community in Malaysia.

Appendix 1

Syariah Criminal Offences Enactment of other states in Malaysia which have been used to persecute the Mak Nyah community

ENAKMEN 4 TAHUN 1992 ENAKMEN JENAYAH SYARIAH NEGERI SEMBILAN 1992

BAHAGIAN IV – KESALAHAN Darihal kesalahan mengenai kehormatan diri

Seksyen 66. Lelaki berlagak seperti perempuan. Mana-mana orang lelaki yang memakai pakaian perempuan atau berlagak seperti perempuan di mana-mana tempat awam adalah melakukan satu kesalahan dan hendaklah apabila disabitkan dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi satu ribu ringgit atau penjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi enam bulan atau kedua-duanya.

ENAKMEN 9 TAHUN 1988 ENAKMEN KANUN JENAYAH SYARIAH 1988 (NEGERI KEDAH)

BAHAGIAN II – KESALAHAN-KESALAHAN

Seksyen 7. Pondan. Mana-mana orang lelaki yang memakai pakaian perempuan dan berlagak seperti perempuan di mana-mana tempat awam adalah bersalah atas suatu kesalahan dan boleh, apabila disabitkan, dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi satu ribu ringgit atau penjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi enam bulan atau kedua-duanya.

ENAKMEN 2 TAHUN 1985 ENAKMEN KANUN JENAYAH SYARIAH 1985 (NEGERI KELANTAN)

BAHAGIAN II – KESALAHAN-KESALAHAN

Seksyen 7. Pondan. Seseorang lelaki yang memakai pakaian perempuan dan berlagak seperti perempuan di mana-mana tempat awam adalah bersalah atas suatu kesalahan dan boleh, apabila disabitkan, dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi satu ribu ringgit atau penjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi enam bulan atau kedua-duanya.

ENAKMEN 6 TAHUN 1991 ENAKMEN KESALAHAN SYARIAH (NEGERI MELAKA) 1991

BAHAGIAN IV – KESALAHAN-KESALAHAN LAIN

Seksyen 72. Lelaki berlagak seperti perempuan. Seseorang lelaki yang memakai pakaian perempuan dan berlagak seperti perempuan di mana-mana tempat awam tanpa alasan yang munasabah adalah merupakan suatu kesalahan dan apabila disabitkan kesalahan boleh dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi satu ribu ringgit atau dipenjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi enam bulan atau kedua-duanya sekali.

ENAKMEN 4 TAHUN 1993 ENAKMEN JENAYAH DALAM SYARAK 1991 (NEGERI PERLIS)

BAHAGIAN II – KESALAHAN-KESALAHAN

Seksyen 7. Pondan. (1) Mana-mana orang lelaki yang berlagak seperti perempuan (tasyabbuh) di mana-mana tempat awam adalah bersalah atas suatu kesalahan dan boleh, apabila disabitkan, dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi lima ribu ringgit atau penjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi tiga tahun atau kedua-duanya.

ENAKMEN 3 TAHUN 1995 ENAKMEN KESALAHAN JENAYAH SYARIAH 1995 (NEGERI SABAH)

BAHAGIAN IV – KESALAHAN

Seksyen 92. Lelaki berlagak seperti perempuan atau sebaliknya. Seseorang lelaki yang memakai pakaian perempuan atau berlagak seperti perempuan atau sebaliknya di mana-mana tempat awam adalah bersalah atas suatu kesalahan dan boleh, apabila disabitkan dikenakan hukuman denda tidak melebihi satu ribu ringgit atau penjara selama tempoh tidak melebihi enam bulan atau kedua-duanya sekali.

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What does it take to give our Mak Nyah sister’s their rights to live without discrimination and prejudice? They are but a reflection of us….what they go through is a reflection of our “uncaring” attitude…not only towards the Mak Nyah but towards our neighbours, family and friends. When are we going to stand up for those that truly needs us.

What is it about life that is so….mysterious that to date, I have yet to find an answer that fully satisfy me and yet…if I found the answer, would I be satisfied? What is it about life that makes me want to know the things that I don’t know and yet…if I found the answer, would I still be the ‘I don’t know’ or would I be the “I know’ but I actually ‘don’t know’? What is it about life that makes me want to be right and maybe…I am not right and I am not wrong either and still I am right. What is it about life that makes me feel what I feel but then again…am I ‘feeling’ or am I thinking of what I am feeling?

Is it me…or is it life?

http://www.utusan.com.my/utusan/info.asp?y=2009&dt=1222&pub=Utusan_Malaysia&sec=Rencana&pg=re_06.htm

BARU-BARU ini kita dikejutkan dengan isu perkahwinan sejenis antara lelaki Melayu dan British. Perkahwinan yang menjadi perkara asing di negara kita ini mendapat liputan meluas media tempatan dan luar negara.

Isu itu timbul apabila lelaki Melayu berkenaan berdepan dengan tindakan undangundang untuk dihantar pulang ke Malaysia kerana tinggal melebihi tempoh.

Permohonan untuk melanjutkan tempoh visa ditolak oleh pihak berkuasa di sana. Perkara ini telah dapat dihidu oleh media dan bermulalah berbagai babak dan kisah rentetan daripada itu.

Tanpa mahu mengulas lebih lanjut isu imigrasi berkenaan, penulis terpanggil untuk membicarakan berkenaan isu transgender ataupun transeksual yang sebenarnya menjadi isu utama dalam perkara ini.

Suka atau tidak kita harus mengakui kewujudan golongan ini di dalam masyarakat. Tidak dinafikan mereka ini turut menyumbang kepada negara sebagai tenaga kerja.

Namun begitu tanpa mahu bersikap prejudis kita harus juga mengakui bagaimana mereka ini tidak sedikit juga bilangannya yang menjadi ‘penghibur’ di lorong-lorong gelap.

Banyak perkara sebenarnya yang perlu diberikan perhatian dan ketelitian dalam membicarakan berkenaan isu ini.

Dari segi fitrah manusia yang normal, perkara ini tentulah menjadi tabu dan mendapat tentangan dari masyarakat terutamanya kita, masyarakat Timur yang kaya dengan adat dan kebudayaan.

Dari sudut keagamaan, Islam umpamanya sangat-sangat melarang umatnya dari berpakaian menyerupai wanita dan sebaliknya atau melakukan perhubungan seks luar tabii walaupun bersama ‘pasangan yang sah’ apatah lagi perkahwinan sejantina.

Adalah tidak adil menyalahkan Tuhan dengan menyatakan bahawa mereka ‘terperangkap’ di dalam fizikal yang salah kerana manusia telah dianugerahkan dengan akal untuk berfikir mana yang baik dan buruk.

Bahkan telah diceritakan di dalam kitab suci bagaimana Tuhan melaknat golongan ini semasa zaman Nabi Lut a.s.

Objektif perkahwinan yang salah satunya adalah untuk mengembangkan zuriat manusia juga tidak akan tercapai.

Dari sudut kesihatan telah dibuktikan bahawa salah satu cabang penyebaran virus HIV yang membawa kepada AIDS juga adalah berpunca daripada perhubungan terlarang seperti ini.

Akhir-akhir ini terdapat pandangan-pandangan yang menyeru agar masyarakat lebih terbuka dalam membicarakan isu ini.

Masyarakat kita dikatakan ketinggalan zaman dan jumud. Tidak moden. Tidak boleh menerima kepelbagaian dalam rencam kehidupan manusia. Kurang prihatin, tidak bertoleransi dan pelbagai lagi.

Bagi penulis, keterbukaan terhadap sesuatu isu adalah amat digalakkan asalkan ada logiknya serta mempunyai nilai-nilai murni yang boleh dijadikan sempadan.

Paling penting, ia tidak melanggar hukum Tuhan. Ini kerana keterbukaan juga mempunyai batasannya.

Di Barat, golongan ini mempunyai ruang untuk menjalani kehidupan mereka bahkan juga mempunyai persatuan sendiri memperjuangkan hak-hak mereka yang berdiri atas platform hak kebebasan manusia.

Sebagai ingatan tidaklah semua yang datang dari Barat itu baik bahkan banyak yang boleh dipertikaikan.

Keghairahan mereka dalam memperjuangkan hak-hak kemanusiaan menggila hinggakan ada ketikanya perkahwinan sesama mahram juga dihalalkan.

Janganlah membabi buta bersikap terbuka terhadap sesuatu sedangkan perkara itu diketahui mempunyai keburukan yang nyata.

Ditakuti di masa depan tidak dapat dibezakan lagi yang mana lelaki dan yang mana wanita kerana yang ada hanyalah manusia yang tidak berjantina.

MUNIR AFIRUDDIN WAHAB
Bukit Indah, Ampang

This article was in one of the leading Malay newpaper in Malaysia. As A Muslim, it was very upsetting to read the uncompromising outlook of Islam towards the transgendered community. Whatever happened to acceptance and tolerance….whatever happened to understanding.

It is true when they say that…it is not Islam that discriminates…it is MUSLIMS that discriminate against Muslim.

The Islam that I know is beautiful…it does not discriminate…it does not judge. Only God judges us…the mere mortal. Who are we to judge others…even by reciting the Quran itself…it is not our place to be judge…to be the judge.

Why are we so busy criticizing others when we ourselves are not perfect?

It is sad….that we refused to look beyond the misgiving of others and accept people who they are….it is truly sad indeed.

2009 was a year of realisation. There were many such incident which brought me back to reality.

1. Realisation 1 – Death comes without us knowing. Be kind to everyone coz you won’t know what happens tomorrow.
2. Realisation 2 – The world does not revolve around me. There are other things that matters. Sometimes this things may seem trivial but it affects our lives in ways that you can’t imagine.
3. Realisation 3 – In my quest to find material happiness, I pushed aside what matters to me most…my partner…my family…almost losing it all. Take time…make time to be with those that matters because you matter to them just like they matter to you.
4. Realisation 4 – Faith….have faith, coz somehow….faith will be entwine in your life no matter how you try to push it aside. Have faith…coz faith, will set you free.
5. Realisation 5 – Love is not easy. Love is about compromising, understanding and accepting the other person for who they are. Love is also about compromising, understanding and accepting who YOU are.

There were many times when I had conversations with myself on this realisation and I came to a conclusion that…we are who we make ourselves to be….and we CAN be a better person if we really want to.

Despite all that…we are all addicted to love…the hope, the promises, the happiness that comes with being in love,
In spite all that….we continue…to take chances, instill patience….with hope against all hope that this IS the ONE….the REAL thing…

Love…is a wonderful thing…and yet we tend to take Love for granted…

Have I taken what we have for granted?

I guess if I looked at it from that perspective, maybe I have. Maybe I was just too comfortable with what we have. The fact is…we both are too busy looking at things from our own perspective that I fail to understand her needs. I am not going to blame her for whatever that is going on now….I blame ME!!! I am selfish, I am a bastard.

I just need to understand….after a decade together…what is important? What should be the link that hold a relationship together? I guess LOVE is not enough….then what is. With love comes understanding, compromise and conversation…but even that is not enough to hold LOVE together. Then what IS?

I have given my heart…and now…I have nothing…and the saddest part is….I feel like there’s this stone in my heart…which is pressing against the core of my being.

I know what I want…but it’s been too many times I’ve been through this uncertainty. Can I take it any longer? I really don’t know.

I know that I still do love you, with all my soul….as you have my heart. I am hurt…hurt beyond repair….and when the silver lining comes my way….I will embrace it and will ensure that I will not do the same mistake again.

I was confused, shocked with the emotions I’m feeling. I don’t know this man personally and yet I felt like he’s my family…like I know him somehow, somewhere. My sanity spoke out….laughing at my emotions…telling me how ridiculous I was to be crying over someone that I hardly knew but my emotions answered strongly through his music.

This was a man – who spoke through his music. He touches the whole world, regardless of color, ethnicity, background, age with his Beat it, Bad, Black or White, Thriller and many more which I have listened consciously or not for a million times. I’ll sing and dance to it….trying to do my best MJ imitation and to look cool at the same time. His music accompanied me when I was young, lonely, restless and reckless. His music accompanied me when I was older, bolder and wiser. His music spoke to me beyond time….beyond age….beyond wisdom.

His death brought out all kinds of emotions that I thought I would never felt with someone I hardly knew and yet…I do know him…he’s part of my growing up, he’s part of me….he’s a apart of my life.

His music heal the world – and for that, I say to you Michael Jackson, ” Thank you for the Music, and Thank you for being you”.

RIP MJ and God Bless

Anyway, it never fail to impress me on how our children are nowadays…what with their intelligence….and net savvy…they truly are our future leaders…and its true when our parents tell us to becareful of what you say or do infront of the kids…coz they listen…and they follow.

The colors of life tells a different story everytime.

Fatwa on tomboys

KOTA BARU: The National Fatwa Council has ruled that tomboyism, where a girl behaves or dresses in a boyish manner, is forbidden in Islam.

Its chairman Datuk Dr Abdul Shukor Husin said the decision was prompted by recent developments as there had been cases of young women inclined to behave like men and indulging in homosexuality.

Parents must stop their children from indulging in disruptive activities that are against Islamic teachings, he told reporters here yesterday. €“ Bernama

Hehe….wearing a man’s clothes is forbidden…watta life. Instead of them focusing on clothing, why don’t they look on the fact that so many incestuous rape that’s been happening….or is that Okay!!!